The Golden Age for women entrepreneurs has finally begun. Enterprising females are equipped with inspiration, know-how and inner grr to expand their opportunities. The rate of women entrepreneurs has been growing at a percentage at least double that of their male counterparts. The 2016 BNP Paribas Global Entrepreneur Report found that companies helmed by women entrepreneurs had 13% higher revenues than those run by men and finished 9% above the average for all entrepreneurs surveyed. Yet women have been conditioned to think they are not capable as men when it comes to launching and growing business.

The mindset of the 17th century still lurks in the heads of some men and women alike. Women are not given the benefit of the doubt that they can do the same job as good or better than their male counterparts. The irony is that the further women had progressed into your career, the more opportunities for the imposter complex to rear its head.

In 1978, clinical psychologists Dr Pauline R. Clance and Suzanne A. Imes coined the terms “Imposter Syndrome” to described they found in numerous high achieving women lived with a fear or belief that they didn’t deserve their success, a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud”, attributing their achievements to luck, generosity or naivety of others. In 1993, Clance conceded that imposter syndrome as a uniquely female problem has been incorrect as males in were just as likely as females to have low expectations of success.

You can never eradicate the feelings associated with Imposter Syndrome. However, you can learn to dance with it, combat it and break through it quickly to rise again. Here are nine ways to curb these feelings in a healthy, proactive way.

Learn to dance

The most important step is learning how to dance with the imposter. You know what the feeling is called, you know others that suffer from it, you know a little bit about why you feel this way. Invite it in and remind yourself why it is here and what it means. View it as a friend and when it rears its ugly head, and it will, take a deep breath, pause for a minute, put a smile on your face and say, “Welcome back old friend. I am glad you are here because it means I have reached a point of success. Now, let’s get to work.”

Accomplishment Box

Investing time and energy in to celebrating your accomplishments is a resourceful way of reflecting on all the hard work you have put in to achieve your success. Embrace the fact that you got yourself to where you are, you earned your stripes and your accomplishments are the evidence that your ego is looking for.

Don’t derail from what’s yours

Asking yourself quality questions enables you to identify what is rightfully yours. Squash negative self-talk by asking quality questions – “What evidence exists that you are any less qualified than anybody else to do this work? Who are you to take away the experience for another human being? What evidence exists that you are just as qualified.” List 5 things. When you identify the worst thing that could happen if it didn’t work, eliminates the guess work and creates perspective.

Reframe your language

When you hear the whisper inside your head, it’s time to reframe your thoughts to move into your authentic confidence. Dare to believe someone when they tell you how remarkable you are and rise to the occasion by saying ‘thank you’.

Updating your language with more confident, assertive statements creates a circuit breaker within your brain. When you repeat repeatedly, you start to believe in what you are saying with ease and grace.

Giving your best is not the same as being your best

Self-acceptance is the key. Being clear about your standards and making progress, not perfection, allows you to contribute and be your type of valuable. You don’t have to be Picasso to be leave your imprint, however when you share your insight, knowledge and wisdom you enrich the lives around you.

Owning it all

You often hear people talking about taking responsibility for your failures yet the same applies with your successes. If you feel that you are undeserving, list all the key things in the past 12 months that you have accomplished.

Reframe failure as feedback and explore the lessons and use them to propel you forward. Remember, self-doubt is the proof of your humanity.

Comparison becomes a dark hole

Too often people fall into the trap of comparing our insides with others outside. The “if only” comes out when you hear yourself say things like, “If only I could speak the confidence that Julie does when on stage”, or “If only I was as artistic as Zoe when she pulls together her launch”, or “If only I could be more like Zak when it comes to making quick decisions”.

As humans we all make comparisons. However, in a world governed by digital media, we do it more now than ever. People continue to showcase the best aspects of their life and you are drawn in to the illusion, triggering questioning your own accomplishments. Re-wiring your thinking by being more self-compassionate and adopting positive self-talk will recalibrate the internal compass.

Shift your thinking

Separating feelings from fact is crucial. There are times you will feel stupid and it happens to everyone from time to time. Just because you may feel stupid doesn’t mean you are.

Adam Grant, in his book Originals, describes two kinds of doubt. Self-doubt, which causes you to freeze up, and Idea-doubt, which can motivate you to work on refining, testing or experimenting with a good idea. Turn self-doubt into idea-doubt by telling yourself that this is a draft of an idea, and you are just not there yet.

Henry Ford once said. “failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently”. Rather than beating yourself up for being human, look for the opportunity – the learning value from the mistake – and move on. 

Self-doubt is a symptom of success

If you have ever thought to yourself, “One of these days people will realize l don’t know as much as they think”, then you are in good company.

Famous actors, CEO’s, and changemakers are most likely to encounter the imposter syndrome. Success is synonymous with coming face-to-face with self-doubt. It doesn’t matter who you are, imposter feelings can strike at any time. It affects some of the world’s most celebrated people.

Facebook’s COO Sherly Sandberg has said, “There are still days l wake up feeling like a fraud, not sure I should be where I am”. The Harry Potter actress and UN ambassador, Emma Watson has repeatedly admitted she feels like an imposter. In his book “The Icarus Deception”, Seth Godin wrote that he still feels like a fraud despite having published a dozen best sellers.

When you feel like a fraud, you are doing something right. Remember, you have got this.


Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.


In modern times, leaders are burnt out and living overscheduled lifestyles. Stuck in cycle of overwhelm, never accomplishing enough, and living in acceptance that this is the way life is. People are drained, emotionally exhausted and stressed. Many women tell themselves to “suck it up, princess” rather than rest and reassess.

Often people are redirected to manage your time better, prioritise, make better to do lists, delegate unnecessary tasks and then when you find the extra hour, you fill it up with some other task. Time is not what we should be tracking. Instead, you need to manage your energy.

Time is inevitable, infinite and unchanging. You schedule your day around timed activities, plan dates with friends and measure your knowledge based on the amount of time that you have been doing something. Yet many people focus on time management to only ever spend numerous hours doing projects and spending little time on themselves.

In a culture of ever-constant burnout, it’s time to shift our focus from managing time to managing energy. Let me share with you 8 tips on how to transcend the time management myth to boost your energy.

Build awareness

To create a shift in thinking requires you to build awareness of your energy. Asking yourself quality questions to expand your thinking –  Identifying what drains you the most? What activities increase your energy? What contributes to a life worth living?

When you have a clear picture of what the picture looks like, you are in a better position to appreciate the activities that elevate your energy or what sucks the energy out of you. Self-reflection is the key to gain clarity and the platform to make different choices.

Identify your natural high energy

You will have a favorite time of the day where your energy levels feel effortless. Some limitless energy in the morning whereas others come to life after lunch. The key is to identify you highest energy levels and exploit them.

Unplug from work

The Harvard Business Review tackled the topic of energy management back in 2007. Eleven years later, their words still ring true. Altering the course of your energy, especially when depletion is on the cards and burnout around the corner. When you can recognize the costs of energy depletion behaviors, you can change them.

Refocusing your energy by practicing de-stressing activities such as meditation, yoga or going for a walk creates a space for you to unplug and feel rejuvenated. Developing rituals before and after work, creates a preventative energy strategy that when you need to intently focus your energy on a project, your energy can be sustained longer term.

Be present in the moment

Presence is the key to building strong relationships as true connection only happens when you give your full attention to others. When you let go of the multitasking attitude and break free from technological distractions, you are more likely to experience a state of flow. Incorporate practices such as mindfulness, meditation or yoga that nurture being in the moment.

Relearn the basics of taking care of yourself

Adequate sleep, healthy food, exercise and deep breathing are the necessities of life. In today’s modern world, people move from stressor to stressor, not allowing their bodies to calm naturally for repair and healing. Bodies remain in a constant state of tension, rather than in a practice of deliberate calm. Calm and energy intertwined create productive work and a happy life. Rest and free time create moments for new ideas to come to surface. Inspiration strikes in moments of idleness.

Lead the way with compassion

Self-compassion inspires you to learn from failures and try again. Self-compassion gives you the energy to progress forward. Self-compassionate people have less anxiety and stress, exhibit more curiosity, creativity and will power. In today’s workplaces, compassion is the driving force that connects people. A go-giver attitude, clear boundaries create a compassionate culture, happier and more productive people. When you do the hard work of cultivating qualities that nurture compassionate environments, the chains of stress and overwork start to break down.

Manage your focus

Instead of taking action, people delude themselves into a false sense of achievement as time is invested in planning the day with a time-management calendar or app. Time is wasted as you spend all your time planning, reading and plotting to manage your time. Ultimately the only thing that really matters is execution. Consistent action, to produce real results.

One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is creating rituals that match your peak energy. The most successful entrepreneurs created rituals to maximize their energy opportunities. Warren Buffet wakes up at 6.45am and spends 80% of his day reading. Richard Branson wakes at 5am, exercises and spend time with his family first thing in the morning. Oprah begins and ends her day with stillness.

Successful people execute habitually when their energy levels are at their peak. This creates a platform where they don’t manage their time, they allow themselves to perform consistently at their best.

Humans are not robots

Human factors drive productivity, not traditional time management practices. Humans cannot perform efficiently and perfectly 24/7. We are not machines or robots. When you invest your energy into scheduling your most important activities around your highest energy levels, book in regular down time and create rituals that you stick to religiously, you are leading you. Manage your energy, not your time.

 

Going against the grain can be challenging. It requires creativity, a willingness to explore and reshape the systems that we operate in. If more people start to reclaim their energy, new realities are created, and new visions are brought to life. Isn’t time? If not now, when? If not you, who?


Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.


Business lives or dies on the decisions you make and the attitudes you hold from the very beginning. All mindsets feed the ego. Business is a wild ride, with lots of ups and downs and unexpected turns.

The best workplaces represent a commitment by every person to becoming their best self. Starting with the founder, the alignment of personal and organisational values creates the compass for all decision making. When you move your ego to the side and place your best self forward, you create a value-based focus in the workplace.

Let me share with you 11 ways how to bypass the ego, and thrive in business today and into the future.

Command and control is buried

Most people associate leaders as those who rise to the top, who display a ‘take charge’ attitude and exude confidence. Command and control models may have worked in the past; however, the world has changed. Leaders with greater self-awareness recognise both their strengths and limitations, rather than handing down their own judgements and ignoring feedback from others.

An inclusive culture doesn’t support the one-hit wonder or the Robin Hood mentality. Leaders understand the limitations of their ego and include others in critical decision making and give away all the rewards.

Invest in the humanity of others

The egoless leader recognizes how to play to their strengths, identifies the gaps in their skill set and confidently hires people capable of closing those gaps. They relinquish the need to control everything, and invest in the humanity of others. They care for their people to deliver immeasurable benefits for their teams and organisation.

Big ideas, tiny egos

De-emphasising where an idea comes from and moving from the ‘I’ to the ‘we’, creates an environment where there is no room for prima donnas. A ‘we’ leader will solicit ideas from all levels, encouraging people who experiement with different ideas and championing unsuccessful efforts. A phenomenal leader thrives from the accomplishment of the team and strives for the greater good of the organisation.

Learn from the fighters

Humility goes hand-in-hand with an egoless leader. Sam Sheridan, the author of A Fighters Heart, interviewed the best fighters in the world. Consistently, messages of humility were identified as being the most important attribute for a great fighter. They put their ego aside, outworked their opponents, always looked for the gaps in their game and constantly pushed their limits.

A big ego makes you afraid to push, to try new things, to open up and grow. Ego makes you complacent and stagnant in your thinking. The epic fighters have an inner fierceness, a focus that belies their calm appearance and a no-excuses drive to do whatever it takes to succeed. A sincere servitude attitude, laser-focused drive and a stoic commitment to a work ethic drives results.

Have courageous conversations

When we avoid dealing with an issue, people can become destructive and business is hindered. When it comes to having a challenging conversation, leave your ego at the door. Park the emotion to the side and approach the conversation with an intent to heal the situation. Our intention and choices dictate the nature of the conversation. Your ability to recognise reality and move beyond the ego will move yourself and your people into endless possibility. Business requires courageous conversations.

Confidence is quiet, insecurities are loud

When the ego is at the forefront, arrogance can kill opportunities. The loud egocentric leader who doesn’t permit dialogue, judges people who share their experiences, and lacks the emotional intelligence, kills dreams quickly.

Close-minded people are less likely to discover new ideas, as they disengage from learning from others or forming connections. False assumptions are made, team work is devalued, and humility gets thrown out the window.

First impressions are everlasting and sometimes a second chance is not an option. Actions will always be stronger than words and when you open the door to growth, people and business thrive.

Admit what you don’t know

The first step towards gaining greater knowledge is admitting what you do not know. It means leaving the ego behind and exercising humility to addressing complex problems. When you become more comfortable with the notion that there is nothing wrong with a leader gathering their team, identifying strengths and limitations, then reaching out to those with a better appreciation of a situation regardless of their profession or walk of life is part of the fabric of the business.

An enviroment of collaboration

When egos are left behind, an environment of collaboration will become the platform of your culture. The leader sets the tone and when it turns into a culture, the belief is infused throughout the organisation. When you come in with an open mind and focus on mission success, you will foster a culture of collaboration. This will permeate the tapestry of the organisation. Success is based on relationships and bringing people graciously along, not on personal advancement. Recognise that it takes committed team effort to work towards viable solutions.

Heavy lifting to build the muscle

Leaders need to be present when it counts. When leaders worry only about themselves and show up for the ‘performance’, their ego is driving the ship. Valued leaders are there before and long after the event. They are engaged with their team, not all the time, but are there for the heavy lifting.

Leaving ego behind has different meanings to different people. It takes a humble leader to admit what they do not know to lead our organisation’s most precious treasure – our daughters, sons, mothers and fathers. Egos bent on personal glory are not what we need in 21st century. People deserve putting the team first and egos last.

Wake-up call

In leadership, if you think everyone else is the problem, it usually means you’re the problem. Resistance is painful, but commitment to facing it the problem empowering. Power struggles and dysfunctional behavior are ubiquitous in businesses of all sizes. When blaming, avoiding conflict, over-controlling, and assuming ill-intent run amok, people stop looking ahead and bury their head in the sand instead. Conflict laden environments undermine employee happiness. Dysfunction is an automatic response to stress or fear. In fact, dysfunction is learned, predictable and most importactly – changeable.

The key for individuals, teams or organisations to break the cycle is to ask quality questions about the choices they make in certain situations. What did you do to help? What do you know for sure? What could you do next to add value? What would you be doing to help if you didn’t have your story? What are you committing to do next? Looking outward and considering the vulnerabilities of others creates the space for you to emphasise with how they feel.

It starts with you

To break through the turf wars in your organization, it starts with you. Working on yourself is the highest act of leadership. Alone, you can make good decisions. Collaboratively, you envision greater opportunities. Checking your ego means abandoning pursuit of approval, attention, and appreciation and then channeling your energy to awakening and leading with the ultimate version of you.


Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.


The biggest disease in the 21st century is not diabetes or cancer – but rather, your self-loathing. Jack Kornfield once reported that the Dalai Lama did not understand the idea that one could dislike oneself. Cultivating inner peace is supported by self-compassion. Buddhists talk a lot about the importance of compassion and you must care about yourself before you can really care about other people. That advice probably sounds familiar from all the airplane safety announcements!

Self-compassion involves becoming aware of the presence of suffering in our bodies, emotions, thoughts, and actions, and then taking steps to diminish the suffering. Kristin Neff, a psychologist, was the pioneer in defining self-compassion as kindness toward self in good times and bad; being gentle, supportive and understanding even when we make mistakes. When you embrace self-compassion, you understand that your self-worth is unconditional. People who are self-compassionate have a greater social connectedness, emotional intelligence, happiness and overall emotional well-being. Nurturing self-compassion allows people to flourish and appreciate the richness of life, even in the hard times. When we consciously choose to soothe the mind with self-compassion, we can orient ourselves towards joyful moments.

Even though research supports the claim that showing self-compassion promotes greater health and wellbeing, for many, self-compassion carries a whiff of many bad labels. Selfish, self-centered, self-serving – and let’s not leave out self-pity. Our culture promotes blame and shame as though it wins us awards. There are many misgivings about the idea of self-compassion, as many do not know what it looks like, let alone how to practice it.

Self-compassion holds wisdom that many do not see. There is a commonality across humanity that every individual is flawed and imperfect. Brene Brown reminds us in The Gifts of Imperfection that every person experiences misfortune, though that’s something we often forget.We take on the burden of feeling things “shouldn’t be happening”, which stirs feelings of shame and isolation and drives us to bury ourselves further in our own suffering.

So, what is the answer? Stop judging, being critical, labelling yourself as entirely good or bad. Remove the blame-filled self-evaluation altogether. Open your heart and treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion you would show another human being.

Neuroscience suggests that self-criticism shifts the brain into a state of self-punishment that causes us to disengage and stops us from acting. It leaves us in a cycle of procrastination, rumination and self-loathing. When we tap into our self-compassion we break the patterns of self-criticism, acknowledging our fears and allowing our compassionate voice to rise to the occasion as a wise and supportive mentor.

Dr Kristin Neff describes three core qualities of self-compassion – self kindness, common humanity and mindfulness. Collectively, these elements help reduce our levels of stress and self-doubt by allowing ourselves to see doubts for what they are: Stories created about things we fear, and not the truth about who we are or what we are capable of.

Our culture is currently experiencing an epidemic of self-criticism. To survive in this VUCA (volatile, uncertain, chaotic, ambiguous) world, most people have become adept at self-criticism. We tell ourselves off for our failures, for not working hard or smart enough. And if that’s not enough, we pound ourselves day in day out to the point where people lose the will to get out of bed.

The antidote is self-compassion. If you tend to dwell on mistakes and subscribe to the mantra of ‘never good enough’, you could benefit from practicing a little more self-compassion. Let me show you six simple ways to tune into your self-compassion.

Self-compassion can also be trendy

Pulling up your socks and maintaining a facade of “toughness” is ingrained in our culture.  Harsh self-criticism is common – do you call yourself names? Replay mistakes in your head like a record player? Beat yourself up for mistakes and punish yourself for failures?

Rather than hosting a pity party, self-compassion creates a space to view through a lens of gentler words, that failure is a universal experience and that suffering is a choice. When we step into self-compassion, it increases your motivation to recover from failure, enhances your self-worth, and increases your resilience against adversity.

Picture your best self

Imagine your life five years from now. Write a letter capturing where you will be in 5 years as if you’re already there, describing your life in detail. Where you are living? What are you doing? Who is in your life? What is the taste of the food that you are eating, or the view from your house? Who are you sharing the experience with? Identify small actions that you can take to bring you closer to this vision. When you bring awareness and intention to who you want to be, you can shift your focus on cultivating your “beingness” from a place of kindness and self-care.

Deepen your connection to yourself

Sometimes in life, we need to press pause. Notice your emotions and how your body feels.  Your body is a messenger bearing a lot of important information, and you should practice listening to it. Get in tune and become aware of sensations without labelling your emotions as good or bad. Speak to yourself like a trusted friend. When you are trying to recover from setbacks, saying kinder things will make you feel better and help you perform better.

When you are in the moment, be aware without judgement. Allow your feelings their moment in the spotlight. Don’t give them a microphone or hide them in the corner. Be loyal to each feeling, allow it to rise, and then without attachment, let it go.

The beauty of self-compassion is that anyone can learn to do it. There is an exercise that can be used in everyday life when you need self-compassion the most, called the Self-Compassion Break.

Notice victories, no matter the size

There is a lot of strength in appreciating what we have right now. Gratitude helps you move from noticing the gaps, toward celebrating both big and small wins. When we notice the victories despite the size or magnitude, an internal message is reinforced that the journey is more important than the destination. Try writing a gratitude journal, focusing on blessings and the beauty within the world. The results may surprise you.

Re-connect with your truth

We live in a world where ‘should do’ or ‘have to do’, where some things simply need to be done. Making a list of priorities is a way to stay focused when everything on the list is out of alignment with your values. Review the list, identify your priorities, ask for help with tasks, change your perspective towards the task, or simply let it go.

Accept that you are not perfect and when you are confronted with your shortcomings, remind yourself that you are valued by your friends for who you are, not because you are faultless. You do not need to be a certain way to be worthy of love.

Tapping into the inner child

Nourishing your heart and mind by reconnecting to child-like qualities inspires creativity and makes us more productive. Find a new café for an afternoon treat, take a pole dancing class, or invest in charcoal drawing. Engage in an activity that warms your heart and brings out your sense of curiosity and wonder.


It’s time to remind yourself that you are human. So, when you do not meet your standards, take a moment, be grateful for the opportunity, commit to your persistence, pick yourself up and go again. Celebrate that you are not perfect. You are imperfectly flawed and that is fabulous.

(Editor’s note: Our Make Your Mark Journal and ‘Phenomenal Woman’ Planner guide you through many similar exercises, to help you become the phenomenal woman and leader you truly are!)

 

Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.


Have you ever seen a successful person cast with a spell over them? The glitz and the glamour, spewing glitter from every orifice. How did you feel?

Let me introduce you to pleasure derived from some else’s misfortune –schadenfreude. Did you know that envy is registered in the mind like a real feeling of bodily pain? On the other hand, schadenfreude induces a pleasant euphoric state akin to a low-grade orgasm.  Why am I sharing this? Because no one is talking about it. People may know it, may be familiar with it, however many do not confront, deal or embrace it. May be it’s time to unplug and make sure that you aren’t getting off at someone else’s expense.

Bruna Martinuzzi, author of The Green-Eyed Monster, states that envy is one of the disruptive emotions that affects our corporate environments. The “I want what you have” mentality. When we delve deeper into the fundamental factors that underpin envy, making comparisons rears its ugly head.

Throughout childhood we are introduced to the natural human impulse to measure ourselves against what others do and what they have. We drag a bag behind us stuffed with parts of ourselves that are not acceptable to families and friends, and then spend the rest of our lives trying to get them out. Early messages about success, power and vulnerability are infused in our thinking, and our judging mind generates feelings of envy.

There was a time when envy served a purpose in helping us to keep alive. Today, envy is no longer geared toward our survival. However, when we perceive that we are being disadvantaged our survival instincts kick in. Think Fear of Missing Out, or not being invited to a business meeting. We begin to create stories about how we were overlooked and how unfair the decision was.  Our sense of inferiority magnifies and our brain registers envy as pain.

Envy is woven within the fabric of our organisations and the ripples are crippling. It affects employee moods, morale, culture, and leads to employee disengagement and loss of productivity. It manifests at work through teams competing for resources and individuals seeking external validation.

Within your organisation, when hiring new high achievers within a team, have you observed long-term employees feeling like the newest additions get preferential treatment? Even though you treat everyone equally, this perception creates water cooler talk that you value the newcomers more, giving them more support and opportunities to shine.

Irrespective of title, people within organisations also play a role in poking the green monster. Check yourself: Do you constantly name drop, brag about your connections with high profile influencers, or shoot down potential ideas as no one can’t outsmart you?

It is impossible to eradicate envy from a workplace. However, leaders can create environments that minimise appearances from the green-eyed monster. Here’s how you can neutralise envy in the workplace.

Open and honest communication within the organization

Encouraging transparent communication and open expression of views creates a space where safety and trust is built. It allows opportunities to prevent envious feelings generating. Nipping envy in the bud eliminates the culmination of negativity before it reaches a critical mass.

Antidote to envy

Once you have confirmed that a leader has been bitten by envy, notice the unwritten rules that appear. “Tell her what she wants to hear to keep the peace and keep your job”. “Don’t rock the boat”. “If you want your idea to be embraced, make it look like his (or hers)”. When our culture is infested with these conclusions it is the start of productivity and performance decline. Gratitude for the privilege of leading others is the antidote to reverse any envy towards another human being.

Let go of bitterness

An ability to say “thank you” is the first step of forgiveness which opens the door of gratitude. Forgiveness is an opportunity to let go of the bitterness that envy breeds. It creates a process of resolution where a perceived wrong may have occurred. When we allow ourselves to experience empathy and compassion it nourishes our soul and enables us to let go. When we choose to better ourselves, humankind improves.

Managing your own envy

Envy can destroy relationships, impede your career and erode your soul. The minute we notice that envy is present, and can name it, we have disrupted its strong pull. Self-awareness creates an opportunity to identify what triggers your envy of others. When a situation arises, examine the context and explore your feelings attached to the situation. Invest your energy into seeing how far you have grown and what areas you need to strengthen.

Advantages of envy

Workplaces can strive to make their culture the envy of their competitors. Create a thriving workplace where key talent is energised and retained for long term success. When you lead by example, consistently take action and focus on tangible results and outcomes whilst nurturing and challenging people, you will establish an enviable workplace culture. People want to live in a culture where they love their jobs, where they feel connected to the vision, and both people and business.

Within the workplace, you may use your envy of a colleague’s promotion as a catalyst for change and inspiration to expand your own knowledge, learning and personal toolbox to create future opportunities. On a deeper level, envy may be the illusion of an unfulfilled need and when we unveil the illusion, a road map of possibilities is the centrepiece.


Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.


Have you ever noticed that many people are walking head-down, going through the motions, looking down on their smart phones, mindlessly going about their day? So many of these people are sleeping, even when they’re moving. They’re living mediocre lives.

Creating an environment of thinking small, being insignificant and choosing a world of mediocrity has become acceptable. Even more than that, it has become the norm. People play a safe game. When did mediocrity become okay?

What happened to people smiling, leaders driving change, being creative, and generating happiness? Not the fake smile happiness. I am talking about the inner revolution. Where possibilities are the norms, culture thrives and people shine. Where culture is permission to be you.

Collaborative mindsets are infectious. Positivity ubiquitous. Imagine every team member sharing the responsibility to spread company culture. What about adopting responsibility for self-management rather than titles, seniority and hierarchy?

Tony Hseih wrote a book called Delivering Happiness that’s about the human side of work. A world where employee satisfaction is the key to business success. Zappos invests lavishly in morale. Each month, employees can reward a co-worker with a $50 company bonus for going above and beyond.

Perhaps you have lost sight of what is truly important and too often focus on what you can’t control. What happens when you unleash happiness, unlock your potential and break free from the herd to create business success? Here’s the thing: You don’t need to be superhuman. Let’s look at how to break free from the cult of mediocrity.

Lead from purpose

Having a purpose means being able to see the bigger picture. Each leader can find purpose and bring it fully to their workplace and lives. Purpose creates a deeper sense of meaning which acts as an intrinsic motivator. It becomes a well that energizes us to keep going in the face of adversity. Purpose provides the foundation for striving something bigger than ourselves. Simon Sinek shares the biology of how great leaders inspire action through a contagious sense of purpose.

Surrender to mediocrity, deserve the shitty life

Conventional thinking perpetuates misery. Days pass blended into the next, sleeping, eating, working and moments of escapism as you check Facebook or watch a new TV show on Netflix. Limiting beliefs hold your thinking ransom: It’s too late to start over. You messed it up before. Who do you think you are, to deserve success?

In the end, your thinking determines how you live. A life of choice, traded for a life of ease. You might find yourself pushed deeper and deeper into the abyss of the mundane, where people spend money for possessions to impress those around them.  To fit in, they sacrifice their lives like sheep bound for the slaughterhouse.

Lead like a warrior

Cultivating your inner warrior, the sacred mixture of masculine and feminine energy, forms a deep sense of wholeness, confidence and inner joy. Speaking your truth creates alignment with how you live your life. Setting boundaries while pursuing what you love ignites your will. Focus on what you have control over – your effort and attitude. Zap negative thoughts out of your head and look for opportunity in every obstacle. Be relentless, ignore the naysayers and the dream stealers. Choose to move forward with total confidence and create your own destiny.

Break free from herd mentality

Despite a world of daily distractions, human beings have choices they can make to carve out a meaningful life. Distractions eat up valuable time that you could invest in self-development. To help you steer clear of the herd, be clear about where you’re heading. Be self-aware and don’t stare in the rear-view mirror. Knowledge is power. Educate yourself, invest in expanding your unfamiliar zones and find yourself a mentor.

Eradicate the fixed mindset

Dr Carol Dweck, a psychologist, spent decades researching the concept of a growth mindset. Dr Dweck defined two types of mindsets – fixed and growth mindsets. Leaders in a fixed mindset believe they either are or aren’t good at something, based on their inherent nature. People in a growth mindset believe they can improve through hard work and practice, as everything is an opportunity to grow your intelligence. The growth mindset reflects that your abilities are entirely due to your actions. Eliminate the excuses, blaming, lack of responsibility and reject a way of life that is soul-destroying. Take on new challenges with optimism.

To be different requires tenacity

Inaction will eat your mind alive. It will give you a death sentence for life. Consider this: In 2015 Netflix subscribers globally watched 42.5 billion hours of content. That’s so many hours of wasted time, immersed in doing nothing, disconnected from others and from life. While relaxing is never a bad thing, is that all you do? Don’t wait for someone else to build your idea. Sometimes you must make the big bet, say it out loud and then throw yourself right in so there’s no going back.

Purge toxic people from your life

Most advice given is provided by people who have not attained results in their own life. Instead they preach about what “we” should be doing. Seek advice from someone who has the results you want and eliminate the “Debbie Downers”. There is enough negativity in the world without it penetrating your inner circle and permeating within.

There is never the right moment

You cannot wait for the perfect set of circumstances. They do not not exist. Whether it be for the right person to come along and hold your hand or the someone to fly in to save the day. Don’t fall victim to simply existing, or be destined for the default path of being dominated by life. Make the decision to lead your life.

Build a culture of grit

Big ideas aren’t brought to fruition single-handedly.  Culture amplifies when we collectively share the platform of where we are heading. Focus and grit are celebrated, kool-aid is tipped down the sink and the spirit of risk taking is honored. As your team grows, individually and collectively, those who practice company core values are rewarded.


Being mediocre is easy. Anybody can do it. And most people do. Following your passion, being crazy enough to try to change the world and standing for something important is hard. That’s bold.

 

Angela Kambouris is a highly-valued leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma. She is super-passionate about unlocking human potential to deliver extraordinary results and has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in the areas of self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business.  She has master-minded with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world.